WHOSE THE BOSS? what you can do i can do better!

Time check, 6:00 a.m.......hmmmmnnnnn.... i still have 30 minutes for my early morning facebook ritual before rushing to the bathroom. 


One friend wrote: "men's brain is between the legs!" Whoa?????.....as i scroll down i read: "men's ego is higher than the mountain ang wider than the sea!" oh oh! what's happening? Looks like women are heeding for protest! lol. Very timely for wall street protest indeed! 
As i scrolled down, my friend archie posted this: 

Archie Pacana

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

Oh huh, so even men have the same views? While we are in the car going to our work this morning, we indulge on the same topic....well, looks like men are the best subject when it comes to criticism huh?

But seriously speaking, it came into my mind, what is really behind the present family trend in the Philippines? 

For those reading this that are not from my country, let me inform you that more and more filipinos each day are living in a very unusual set up. Present statistics shows that more and more women go out for work in and outside the country, and more and more men are staying at home, while we are raised to believe that men are the head of the family. 

Biblically speaking, he  is to look after the needs of his wife and children. Needless to say, this belief originated from the start of the creation of mankind. God said: "man, you are to take charge of the garden". This means that on man's shoulders, God bestowed the responsibility of raising up and protecting his family. On the contrary, more and more men are jobless, stay at home, and well, sad to say some wouldn't even stay at home. 

I remembered stories my grand mother told us before, as we gathered around her, how women are expected to stay in the house, take care of the children, and  attend to husband's needs. All needs! that is.......!

I can't help but sigh, how much relief it would be if the same still exist to date. But that seems like a fantasy. For a working mother like me i really felt the pain of not being able to watch my children grow. 

I was inside the faculty room (it's my free day, whuuuu... what a relief, i can do some net surfing and check my student's projects... and some extra stuff, you know what i mean....lol)i was in the middle of these thoughts, and i semi -consciously, ask a coleague (she is a saudi), "what do you think, are women better than men, or men better than women?" right away with wide eyes and without wasting a single thought, she blurted out, "oh oh....of course we are better than men!" and i said, "why?" without batting an eyelash she said, "we are more intelligent, we are compassionate, lovable, responsible....." "we can multi-task, we are hard workers, we are loyal!" answered another colleague from Pakistan ", and we are reliable, trustworthy dedicated, enduring etc...etc..." seems like an endless opinion of another one from Egypt.

Surprised as i am dumbfounded to realize that the situation is not only prevalent in the Philippines, but alas! it's all over the world! Another Saudi colleague continued, " you see, a Saudi man, wherever he is, is still a Saudi man, and an american even if he lives in Asia is still an american man, so is a filipino or a china man in america is still Chinese or Filipino. But a man is a man, and they will always be what they are, wherever they are, or who ever they are! Men are immature, self centered,  inconsiderate and selfish. They just do what they want to do without thinking of the consequence!" 

oh oh! sounds like men are gaining a very notorious reputation! no offense meant guys, this is not my personal opinion, but a majority observation. lol! 

Personally, i think men are full of vices(sorry guys), maybe because of wrong notion that  real men are those men that smokes, drinks, commits adultery, doesn't wash their faces, don't wear attractive clothes, doesn't use creams and lotions, doesn't go for facial, etc. etc., save for those that are truly dedicated and God fearing.

Having a failed marriage (mostly because of the man's attitude and incompetence issues) and due to inconceivable deferences, and having married too early with zero experience on having boyfriends, i'm having a hard time understanding men's nature. This triggered my curiosity to do some research (to be fair to men at least)! 

I then found out that women expatriates had reach a phenomenal stage worldwide. From the Philippines, to Indonesia, to Borneo, to India, Sri Lanka, Ethiopia, Morocco, Egypt, Sudan, Mexico, even as to parts of Europe like Romania,  Albania, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Bulgaria, Croatia, Kosovo, Macedonia, Montenegro, Romania and Serbia, to name a few. In fact there is even a small town named Varshets, a remote town in Bulgaria’s Montana district, where there are no women left. Everyone left to work either in Italy, Spain, or any country where there is a need for menial, cheap labor, Leaving their husbands and children behind to earn money for the family. file:///C:/Users/Rose/Desktop/my%20blogs-images/references/Topic%202009%20-%20Identity%20%20Families%20Pay%20the%20Price%20as%20Women%20Go%20West%20%20%20%20Balkan%20Fellowship%20for%20Journalistic%20Excellence.htm

Sad but it's true, life is changing and so is its pattern. One could easily exclaim, "what's happening to men?" But if we are to analyze the situation, i think there is more to it than meets the eye. For one, men in general had this innate desire to keep their macho image. Nor are they comfortable confiding to someone their problems. They have the tendency to protect that image at all cost. Often times they keep their emotions to themselves, feeling like allowing someone see them cry, or express love and adoration, or express their sentiments, might degrade their machismo.

Sadly as i dig out another revelation, statistics around the world show, that more men committed suicide than women. Maybe because fewer men would seek psychiatric help when they are discouraged and depressed. It shows men are unwilling to reveal their pent-up feeling even when they felt "down" and exhausted. http://www.asiaone.com/News/Latest%2BNews/Asia/Story/A1Story20111025-306969.html

The the most reliable information is a personal confession i had extracted from one of my best male friends Allan, who told me that they just appear strong in the outside, but they are weaker emotionally. He said women can cope up with frustrations, break-ups and pain more than they do. Further he said, women can go depressed after a break-up or any other depressing incident only 15 days (oh really?...just 2 weeks!) or 1 month the most. After that, she bounces back to life like she had never been hurt before. While it usually takes them many months or years before they can overcome the same.

I am truly amazed by the unusual coping mechanism of my other best friend named Raffy. He can take the worst financial, family and marital problem in stride. I can't forget the day when he giggled, "hihihihihi....my house has no more roof!" upon the knowledge that he lost the roof of his house in the Philippines to the Typhon that devastated their place. But when we were alone, he drop tears while reciting the litany of his problems. I usually tease him and sing to him, "i laugh with tears in my eyes, like a clown i wear at disguise.....". 

Maybe his capacity to cope is due to his ability to shed a tear, and tell someone of his predicaments. lucky he, because not everyone does! I personally think that men who are not ashame to shed tears are more macho than the "plastic" ones. They are rare, but they are more real!

Further more, i think God just blessed women with unusual inner strength, considerate, compassionate and enduring hearts. What we lack physically, He always compensate emotionally, and maybe more, in some other ways. 


I remembered an old friend, who told me once, "the irony of being a man is, when they see a man that has some feminine qualities, everyone thinks he is gay, but when they see women that has some masculine qualities, they will think she is strong!"

Very well said! What can i say? KUDOS TO WOMEN!